I wasn't missing...

hey

Sunday again. i hate weekends. as much as weekdays.

doctor says i need hypnotherapy, we'll see how this goes ...

Im in love with Birds of Tokyo's new album UNIVERSES. its brilliant. people should listen to it.

I'm bummed the living end havent included Tasmania in their "MAJOR NATIONAL TOUR".. bastards

thats the thanks i get for being a fan for all these years..

matts doing surgery today at the hospital. am supposed to be going to mums but cant be stuffed driving all that way, i cant afford the petrol.

okay now im starting to feel lonely.

'what a major fucking waste of my time';=

anyone seen Black SHeep? brilliant movie lol..wonder what the new zealanders thought of it?

i really should go shower. and exercise and do the washing.

im sad matts leaving me next year for the coast. so sad.

i hated long distant relationship we had for 3 years. now its going to be 4 years.

sigh

-what a lie, what a thief, what a major fucking waste of my time i'm glad i know you.. ive got my medicine-

<3 maybe the drs right and i do need hypnotherapy.

its 4 oclock in the fucking morning

cranking the old school Used.

feeling low.

shit.

had the quarterly awards today. was nice to see Sam H again. sigh. i got a mention:) then the alcohol came and matt not wanting to hang out with me and going to shitty pub places with smoke so bad i can still feel it in my lungs and with loud lesbians and skanky girls and bogan stoned males. gah. how can he like places like that? i cant stand this.

feel so different to him.

love the used still:)

mehness.

life is so meh.

blah

meh.

sigh. i hate alcohol. i hate that it has to be a norm in life.. that to relax people drink, in anger people drink, to celebrate, to mourn (personally). to socialise in a normal setting. what the fuck?! why cant people just TALK?! why do they need alcohol at every function to be happy and sociable? (dont think thats a word..) i hate it and i resent it and i cant stand it. and i want to stay sober and not drink but with my job and with the group i try and fit in with and everything..alcohol is a part of life. and i hate it.

i cant take it.

<3

dear xanga.

not alot to report today. saw kate play soccer. then saw ethan, essie and Bunk. Essie has learned the "round and round the garden" rhyme and traces her finger around our hands barely, but slightly making out "one step" in baby language, and then tickles our hands and in a high squeal giggles like we do to her. its adorable. and her "twinkle twinkle" hand actions are superb.

feeling muddled still. anxious. gahhhhh!